:: 21 Best Deployment Tips ::

Deployments are never easy. No matter how many you go through, you might get use to them but they are still always hard. Below are 21 Best Tips for dealing with a Spouse's Deployment. These tips below are tips by Military Wives who are giving their best advice on how they cope with their Husbands' deployment. Here they shoulder the enormous responsibility and inevitable sacrifices that come with being a Military Wife.

1. Hang tough. "I'm stronger now when he's gone, and I don't focus as much on being left here, though I do have bouts of loneliness and frustration. I try to keep myself busy. Writing him e-mails helps." -- Miranda

2. Keep Busy. "The very first night he's hone, I'm out of my mind with sadness. I just cry all night and hug something that smells like him. After the first week or so, I start getting busy with my own thing. A typical day with my husband gone: Go to work, go to school, go to the gym and work on my Website until bedtime. I also set goals for finishing things, saving money and getting in shape." -- Alyssa

3. Call on your friends. "At first it's a little taste of freedom since we don't have any kids. It was nice having the house all to myself without having him flip through the channels on the TV or other silly stuff. But by that first night I was very lonely. I had some really terrific friends and they were always there for the rough patches." -- Mara

4. Remember your promise. " The most common emotion is one of being overwhelmed. With the kids and the house and no help and no relief in sight, its often really hard to keep from being completely overwhelmed. But I'm a military wife. I knew the job description when I married him, so I feel like I don't have any right to complain." -- Chelsea

5. Throw a pity part. "I always experience loneliness. I deal with my feelings by giving myself permission to be ' depressed '. I take off from work the first day he is gone. I stay in my pajamas all day, eat microwavable food or order in, watch daytime TV and stay up as later as I want. The next morning I get up and get back to my normal routine." -- Alison

6. Be prepared. " Get as much stuff taken care of ahead of time, so you are as prepared as you can be. Learn to ask for help (I really have trouble with this one). Line up some visits to family and friends to help pass time and give you something to look forward to"
-- Diana

7. Face your feelings. " Take thing one day at a time. And let all your emotions run their course. You are going to have good days, and you are going to have horrible days. When you feel like crying, cry. When you feel like you are on top of the world, you are. When the going gets tough, look for something humorous about what is making life hard at the time. Laughter is a wonderful medicine." -- Katie

8. Be realistic. "Don't set impossible goals. Remember that nothing is set in stone. Six months can turn to seven, and he misses you as much as you miss him." -- Terri

9. Accept a helping hand. " I learned to accept and, yes, sometimes even as for help from others. Find a support group (such as USMC GALS), be it online (my option) or a family support group (if one is nearby)." -- Kelly

10. Do not drown your sorrows. " I would go out with friends (fellow deployment widows) on Friday nights and have a few beers, and then on Sundays I'd try to figure out why I couldn't stop crying! I them remembered that alcohol is a depressant, and it wasn't conductive to me being ' happy girl '. So, I became more careful about the amount of alcohol I consumed." -- Carly

11. Stay healthy. " Eat right. Its tempting, while your husband is gone, to snack and not eat well, but you need the best nutrition to help keep your mental state on an even keel"
-- Kim

12. Trust each other. "My husband and I have not always had the perfect marriage, and we've had some serious trust issues in the past. The trust issue presents a huge problem with deployments, and is one of the big sources of pre-deployment arguments. But I just try to keep my husband informed at all times, and he tries to express his fears reasonably instead of with snide remarks. As a result, we often have excellent communication during deployments and always make it through okay." -- Rita

13. Find yourself. "You have to have a life aside from your husband. You just have to, whether it's kids, a job, friends or a hobby. I have actually known a few women who relied on their husbands completely for their happiness. That won't work. You have to have something to do, something you care about, and try to stay busy!" -- Kathryn

14. Keep your routine. "I have learned not to get upset over the pending deployments. There is really nothing I can do to stop them. I try to keep home life as normal as I can for my children." -- Carmen

15. Stay strong. "I'm a pretty independent woman, so that's what has helped me-- I believe -- get through deployments. I still send my man off with lots of love and smiles and reassurances that I can handle the affairs at home, so he need not worry about us."
-- Shelley

16. Keep your husband posted. "I write letters to my husband every day (we don't have access to phones or e-mail this time) detailing what our daughter did that day, so he will feel like he's part of her day-to-day life. I take lots of photos of our daughter to send to him. It's difficult because at times it feels like our lives are ' on hold ' until he returns."
-- Emily

17. Become a boardie. " I keep in contact with other women through message boards, and that helps me remember I'm not doing this alone." -- Alicia

18. Work out. "It goes faster when I'm thinking, " I only have three more months to get a body like Britney Spears (ha, ha)!" -- Becky

19. Stay active. "I have found it vital to have at least one regularly scheduled activity while my husband is gone. It becomes something to look forward to each week, which gives me little milestones along the way." -- Angela

20. Be proud. "I remember that he is gone not because he wants to be away from me, but because he is a terrific person and is dedicating his live to serving his country."
-- Anita

21. Focus on other things. "Keep your chin up. Find things to keep your mind off your loneliness. But avoid sappy movies, unless you need a good cry." -- ZoŽ

 

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